Inviting You to Holding Space: Supporting People in Pain

When we are in pain, uncertainty, grief…
having space held for us
reduces the suffering of isolation and supports us in our challenges.

We sometimes back away from those in pain
because we don’t know what to say…
because we fear hurting them with the wrong words…
because their pain stirs our own fears so profoundly.

Let’s talk about finding words and actions that support others when they are challenged.

Join a conversation with me and Business and Empowerment Coach, SB Rawz, The conversations will be 45 minutes, confidential…and free.

Sunday, November 19, 11:00 AM EST

Wednesday, December 6, 3:00 PM EST

Monday, December 11, 8:00 PM EST

RSVP at calendly.com/sbrawz/holding-space or to me at TheAgeCoach@gmail.com

Winter! Hot Chocolate with Tiny Marshmallows

A cup of hot chocolate with tiny marshmallows, soft music in the background and frost on the windows.

Sounds like a Hallmark winter!

But we need even more for a happy and healthy winter.

As the temperatures fall, it’s important to be intentional about navigating the season. The same activities that make us smile can also protect our bodies and brains.

  • Eat well: Hot chocolate warms the body. Stews and soups, full of vegetables and healthy broth, provide an easy recipe for strength, nutrition, and warmth.
  • Stay hydrated: Add herbal teas and some coffee for warmth and to help blood cells carry nutrients and oxygen to all parts of the body and brain. Fluids have a positive impact on heart health, cognitive alertness, fighting infection…and so much more.
  • Be warm: Maintaining body heat becomes more difficult with age. Layer textured or silky t-shirts under a shirt, topped with a light sweater for inside and a jacket for outside. Thin layers close to the body reserve body heat.
  • Monitor safe travel: Check on the possibility of snow or ice. Plan ahead for someone to clear paths around your house or, better yet, to deliver what you need.
  • Exercise: Exercise is important for the health of the body and brain, but long walks, tennis and a pickup ball game may be out of the question. Winter is a good time, though, to go to the gym for classes to strengthen all parts of the body, challenge the brain, and socialize.
  • Complete a project: Gardening and outside repairs may not be fun in the cold, but you can pick up a project that has been on your mind: organizing photos, thinning out bookshelves, making decisions about household items you haven’t used in years.
  • Learn: What a fine time to settle in with books you have been meaning to read or to learn to play the guitar that is sitting in the corner. Classes at community centers and online offer seemingly unlimited choices for learning new information and skills.
  • And most importantly, socialize: Plan times for long coffees with friends, make regular phone calls, go to community events. Being with people you enjoy can lead to healthier bodies and brains.

Winter can be a “Hallmark moment” when we navigate the season with activities that make us smile.

Would you like to talk about new ways that you…or someone you are caring for… can stay active, healthy and “enjoying life’s hot chocolate”? Contact Dr. Cheryl Greenberg at TheAgeCoach@gmail.com.

Feeling a Little Discouraged by Virus Concerns? Sing a Song!

“I don’t sing because I’m happy; I’m happy because I sing.” – William James

What a great thought! We are looking for ways to feel happy and engaged while still coping with pandemic concerns and rules. How about singing?

If music is not a big part of your life, consider this:

  • Singing familiar songs reduces stress: Breaking into song signals the brain to send hormones (endorphins) through your brain and body that make you feel more content and less stressed. And as researchers have shown, decreasing stress improves overall health and longevity!
  • Singing connects you to pleasant memories: Even people who have concerns about how well they remember find that songs from their childhood or their first love come back to them when they sing, with all the words and feelings they had when they were younger.
  • Singing improves brain function: When you sing, you use many parts of your brain and build new pathways between the cells in your brain. This improves your ability to remember and increases your brain’s “reserve” for remembering in the future.
  • Singing can increase social interactions: Singing in a choir or singing at home with family is not only fun but gives you a chance to build social connections. People who have close bonds with others are happier and healthier.
  • Music has a direct impact on mood and wellness; it has been shown to ease pain, shorten recovery time from illness, and lift feelings of anxiety and depression: How about singing out loud or listening to a favorite playlist?
  • And let’s add some movement to increase the benefits: Tapping your feet, swaying to the rhythm, or whirling around the room with your best version of Beyoncé or Mozart is terrific for the brain and body. Each time you move to music, challenging your brain to coordinate dance steps and melodies, you exercise your muscles, build cardiovascular health and improve your ability to  remember and think.

Singing, dancing  . . . music in general . . . are good for your health, enjoyable, and with the challenges of the pandemic, a particularly helpful way to reduce stress!

Dr. Cheryl Greenberg works as a coach, or guide, for seniors and their families as they consider and plan for changes in their lives. During the pandemic, she leads support groups to help folks stay engaged in creative ways. To join a group or coach with Cheryl, contact her at TheAgeCoach@gmail.com or 336-202-5669.

Staying Engaged during the Pandemic

We are tired of COVID. We are bored with Zoom meetings and missing our friends and family. Days seem to repeat themselves and, as I hear often from coaching clients, we have more time on our hands, but we seem to be doing less.

It’s OK. We can handle this . . . and we should handle it.

After all, we know that staying actively engaged in work, play and social activities is very important to our mental and physical health and even to our ability to remember and problem solve.

So, what are some creative ways we can jump through the hoops of COVID caution for a while longer?

Congratulate Yourself for Your Successes

First, congratulate yourself for the creative ways you have already stayed active and connected to other people.

Noticing your flexibility and creativity is good for your self-esteem, which in turn increases the “healthy hormones” in your body and brain. You remember better, feel happier and are healthier when you have a sense of accomplishment.

Connect with Others

Many people report that they have adjusted to having less face-to-face time with family and friends and have learned to fly solo for work and entertainment.

However, Dr. Susan Pinker tells us that having regular social contact is incredibly important for our physical and mental health. People who are in regular contact with others have fewer health problems, remember better and even live longer!

So, let’s think of new ways to stay closely connected with others.

  • Invite friends to join you for a book group or a virtual tour of Europe.
  • Use an app, such as Netflix Plus, to watch an award winning movie with family members and discuss the film.
  • Schedule online problem solving meetings for work and volunteering.
  • Use a meeting platform to share your new baking (carpentry, gardening or decorating) skills with family. Invite them to work along with you while you give advice.

Commit to New Learning and Adventures

Create new activities that challenge you physically and mentally. This will perk you up, motivate you, get you involved. And, as Dr. Sanjay Gupta writes, novel activities encourage brains to form new cells and pathways; they improve memory and thinking!

  • Have you wanted to be an advocate for social justice, decreasing hunger, consumer rights? Reach out to local libraries, community centers, interfaith organizations to ask how you can help.
  • Have you always wanted to learn another language or build a computer? Find classes online through university emeritus programs, Shepherd’s Centers, art museums and libraries.
  • Local and national organizations need virtual volunteers. Contact VolunteerMatch.com or local organizations, such as the Volunteer Center of the Triad to match your interests with community needs.
  • Exercise is good for your body and brain . . . and can be done with others virtually. Try a fitness activity that is new and challenging, such as tai chi, yoga or strength training.

Most importantly, create your own connections and adventures for staying engaged during the pandemic. Share them with others and “jump through the hoop of COVID cautions” for a little while longer.

Staying Healthy When There’s a Nip in the Air

The chill in the air, frost on the windows in the early morning, bright sunshine through light gray clouds: Winter can be delightful.

For older adults, though, planning is important to ensure safe and enjoyable winter days. Let’s look at a few ideas for staying healthy:

Safety First

Service your home heater. As people get older, it is more difficult to regulate body temperature and more dangerous to stay cold. Have an HVAC service check your heater to be sure that you won’t get caught without heat on a cold day. While you are at it, be sure that portable or room heaters and carbon monoxide detectors are in excellent condition and away from flammable items.

Get ready for snow and ice. Check your supply of de-icer, if you use it, and plan ahead for someone to clear snow. Inventory your emergency supplies, including food, water, medications, batteries and a portable radio or TV, in case of power outages.

Healthy Habits

Eat a varied, colorful diet to ensure your body and brain have nutrients for top performance. What a great time to do this with warm bowls of soup and delicious cranberry whole grain muffins! Cook a big pot of vegetable soup and freeze it in pint jars to eat every week or so. Add some home-baked muffins, and you have healthful food for a December evening. (See recipe ideas at vegetable soups and muffins.)

Exercise is essential for healthy bodies and brains, but the usual neighborhood walks and trips to the gym may be out of the question some days. You can find exercises on the computer at websites such as NIA’s Go4Life, and SilverSneakers.com. Exercise at home or with a neighbor for 30 minutes five times a week.

Games and Books

Stay mentally active to keep your mind healthy. Mah Jong, Bridge, a feisty game of Monopoly, and, of course, any interesting book or magazine make you think, may reduce stress, and are perfect for a healthy brain.

Socializing

Socializing is incredibly important for a healthy body and mind. Bundle up and go to a class or have dinner with friends when you can. When it is just too cold, the telephone and computer can keep you in touch with others. Try using Skype or Facetime to see your friends on the phone or computer while you are talking!

Stay healthy and enjoy the chill in the air!

Would you like help making healthy and safe decisions for yourself or a loved one? Contact Dr. Cheryl Greenberg at TheAgeCoach@gmail.com to discuss your concerns and plan the next steps in a healthy and satisfying future.

Caregiving: Can You Make Medical Decisions?

Who Can Make Medical Decisions in a World with HIPPA?

American’s medical records are protected by the Health Information Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA). Neither friends nor relatives have access to our medical information without the express consent of the patient.

This is usually comforting in a world with so much data and so much communication!

But what happens when a senior needs help with his or her medical decisions? What happens if there are end of life decisions to be made?

Three legal documents give others insight and permissions on behalf of a senior.

  • HIPAA authorization gives permission to the doctor to share medical information with the person(s) that the patient names.
  • An advance health care directive (living will) lists/describes an individual’s preferences about medical care, including whether certain life-sustaining treatments should be administered.
  • A medical power of attorney (health care proxy, durable power of attorney for health care) identifies someone who can act on behalf of the individual if needed.

It is not always comfortable to think about illness and end of life decisions. However, there are many resources available that can help. Attorneys are skilled at advising and preparing the documents. Information and forms are available in print and on the Internet, as well.

For a brief description of medical powers of attorney and living wills, look at WebMD.com’s Advance Directives.

 

Is This Dementia? Memory Changes

He isn’t remembering well. Does He Have a Dementia?

How often has a loved one forgotten something and, for a split second, you said to yourself, “Why didn’t he remember that? What does this mean? Should I be concerned?” Here are guidelines to help you.

The car keys are missing. Is he losing his memory?!

  • We all put our house keys down and forget where we put them.
  • We forget a name even though we know the person.
  • We go to the supermarket for eggs and come home with coffee, bread . . . but no eggs.

Are these signs of dementia?

Everyone forgets from time to time. As we get older, we forget more often.

However, it is not a sign of dementia if we can remember the keys, name and eggs after a little while and our forgetting doesn’t stop us from carrying out our normal activities.

Some forgetting is normal. Taking a little longer to remember as we get older is also normal.

Memory changes that interfere with independent activities – our work, social life, conversations, reading and learning – may indicate a health problem that should be checked by a doctor.

These memory changes may include

  • Not being able to find the right words to express something, not following a conversation, or having difficult completing a thought
  • Forgetting names of people and places
  • Being confused about where one is, not knowing how to get to a familiar location, or not being able to retrace one’s steps
  • Having difficulty recalling the information needed to make appropriate judgements and decisions
  • Not recalling where an item has been placed even with time and effort

HelpGuide.org offers a quick look at how to figure out what forgetting the car keys might indicate at What Does My Forgetting Mean?